You Only Have One Shot, So Ultimately, What Do You Want To Do?



Note: This is a post from Adam Baker, founder of Man Vs. Debt.

Just a short note today to let you know our community and message has been featured on the cover of the July issue of online magazine Fear.Less.

I think it’s one of the best and most engaging interviews I’ve had the pleasure of doing, mostly because of the amazing questions from Ishita Gupta. (The other stories had me hooked, as well!)

Ishita and I discuss how to overcome the overwhelming fear of change – and how influences in our life (like debt) can compound fear and stress. I hope you’ll give it a quick download and read (it’s 100% free).

Fear.Less is the only magazine of any type that I subscribe to. Ishita and crew do a fantastic job of pulling together and highlighting four to five inspiring stories per month. Nearly all of the people featured are far more profound and prolific than our stories. They inspire me every month and I’m honored to be included among them.

Download the July edition of Fear.Less magazine here.

Don’t forget to subscribe to future issues for free right here.

Quick Question: What’s one example in your life where you made a decision in the face of overwhelming fear?

How did you overcome that fear?


Let’s all inspire each other. Please share below. 🙂

42 thoughts on “You Only Have One Shot, So Ultimately, What Do You Want To Do?”

  1. Right after uni – I moved to Korea fearing that some of my relationships wouldn’t stay intact. It turns out the important people found ways to keep in touch & some people actually ended up joining me! I’m going back again in 2 months.

  2. Great to see you published once again in a really inspiring publication. For me, one of my biggest fears was putting my writing out for all to see and facing rejection and the naysayers. Overall, my online writing experience has been very positive and I have found that most people are willing to be supportive and inviting. Facing your fears and pursuing a passion is always an excellent goal!

  3. I used to be a reporter at a daily newspaper and I had this line scratched on a Post It that I kept hung near my desk: “Never been a better time than right now.” (It’s actually a lyric from a Red Hot Chili Peppers song. :)) Even when I was doing something that I was dreading (making a phone call to someone I know wouldn’t want to hear from me, etc.), I would repeat that mantra in my head. It’s still relevant. 🙂

  4. I once started a job and it become clear within 3 days that I hated it and that there was no way it was going to get better. It was not a good fit for me. However, I was raised to push through and stay even if it’s not good for me. After consulting with my husband, I quit that job the next day (day 4) and found another job within the next week. I’m not sure why I was so fearful but I totally believe in the serenity prayer … the courage to change the things I can. That lesson has taught me to listen to the fear, put it out on the table to discuss it, and then act accordingly.

  5. I moved across the country by myself to a place where I knew no one.

    I knew it was a move I wanted to make. As soon as I was sure I wanted to do it, I told everyone about it — people at work, people in different community groups I was involved in, etc. I knew myself well enough that having my whole world know about this would stop me from chickening out 😉

  6. I quit my job a month and a half ago to pursue my blog full time. The fear hasn’t gone away, if anything it’s getting worse. I’ve made a little bit of money (thanks but not much yet. I’m in the middle of creating my first few products (one an e-product, the other a series of coaching products).

    I don’t think I’ll make enough money to pursue this full-time for long. But this starting point is going to give me a boost – a big one. I may have to find another job (part-time, hopefully) to help pay the bills here in a few months, but I also know that if I stay persistent, keep working hard, and never give up that my dream of working full-time for myself will quickly become a reality.

    Even so, it’s very scary.

  7. When we decided to DRIVE to Costa Rica we were terrified! We had no idea what to expect, or if we were jeopardizing the lives of our four children.

    We moved ahead anyway, researched what information we could, and then went for it. What resulted was an incredible experience and the beginning of an amazing life!

  8. We’d talked about moving to a rural area and having some land, but the truth is I was terrified. I was a city girl, born and raised, and thought I would die of….I don’t know what. Boredom? Loneliness? Lack of variety?

    One day I just decided to commit to the idea. After all, what is the worst thing that could happen? Two years later here we are, in a small-ish town that I love, in an area I am totally enamoured with, and on a lovely piece of land that I hope I never, ever have to leave. It was totally the right move for me, and as I look back I wonder what on earth I was so scared of?

  9. Thanks for all the inspiring comments about change, i am over 50 and a contractor, I am about to end a 10 year work contract. So .. for me this is a opertunity to do something that I love. Not sure of the direction I will go in but I feel this is some kind of calling, so off I go with out a fearful bone in my body.I am really looking forward to my change. Baker keep on movin on.

  10. Your posts are always inspiring! For years, I wanted to start a blog, but I was afraid. I finally started my first hobby blog in January, and I love it! I’m still afraid to start the next one, but I’m trying to work my way through… I need to get over my fear of the “complicated” technology (blog design, updates, etc). The writing is easy (has been since I was a kid, I wrote my first book at 11), but the technology is the fear I need to conquer.

  11. I was studying in a degree program I absolutely despised and because I had received a scholarship, felt obligated to stay with it. I ultimately decided to transfer to a different school across the country, but had a whole semester of free time before beginning.

    I booked a ticket to Europe and backpacked solo; I didn’t know anyone or speak the languages. It was scary at times, but more than that – it was a fantastic experience I draw inspiration from regularly.

  12. I’d watched the Ironman Triathlon World Championship on tv for many years, and although I’ve done marathons, etc, never thought I could actually do an Ironman. But when my wife said ‘you’ll regret it if you don’t, and you’re not getting any younger’, I signed up for Ironman Louisville 2010. As soon as I registered (and paid), my mindset went from “I can’t” to “I can, and I will!” Crossing the finish line with my wife and kids there cheering me on was a highlight of my life.

  13. I applied to art school at age 26, 3 years into an unrelated undergraduate program, because after a decade of telling myself I’d never get in or be able to afford it if I did, I realized that if I didn’t try, I’d never know. I didn’t get in, but I made it to the final round of applicants for a highly selective school (10-15 new students per year) that gives all students full scholarships. I was not terribly disappointed because I finally TRIED. The experience gave me the courage and confidence to keep pushing forward toward discovering and attaining my loftier, longer-term goals.

    A year and a half later, I am taking my final 7 credits of a hard-earned undergrad degree – in an interdisciplinary program different than I was in previously – and will be graduating August 4. After that, I’m buckling down and launching into the process of selling all my crap, to which I’ve been building up for about a year, and moving to Paris to join my lovely fiancee, who’s been there in grad school since last September. I don’t have a job lined up, I don’t have a concrete plan – and that’s okay, because I’m conquering my fear.

    Thanks for the inspiration on this journey, Baker!

  14. “How to overcome fear?”

    Vodka helps.

    But really it’s about knowing that everyone else feels the exact way that you do and it’s only those that take a leap of faith that become successful.

    My good friend has a saying that I like to keep stuck to my computer.

    JFDI – Which stands for Just Fucking Do It.

    So whenever I’m procastinating about doing something, usually because I think people will judge me (like not approving this comment because I said the F word in it) I try and stay true to who I am and then JFDI.

    Congrats on your feature by the way.


  15. Consiously working to remove negativity from my life – this was a very difficult process. It meant letting go of people who were a part of my life but not good for me. Standing up for yourself is not always easy and at times I was afraid and discouraged. In the end, I learned to do what is good for me and my family, not to worry about what anyone thinks and to embrace the positive things in my life. I learn from my mistakes and take risks. I spit in the face of obligation and regret.

    Life is too short to allow negativity to be a part of it. One of my favorite quotes is from Bruce Avolio, “You never know whose future life you are shaping simply by pursuing your own aspirations and living up to your own core values.” Good luck to you and your family.

  16. Congratulations! That’s fantastic!
    Oh boy-just ONE instance where I made a decision in the face of fear? I’ve had to do it so many times I’ve lost count! One big recent one was the decision to continue to be a stay-at-home-homeschooling-mom when my husband was out of work and having faith that it would work out. We made the decision together to stay on that track as long as we could. I don’t know if I’d have been able to find a job but we decided to stay with the decision for me to stay home and continue to live off of our savings until we had no choice. I am happy to say it worked out. We moved across country to make it happen but there was a lot of self doubt and fear in that six months, let me tell ya!

  17. Overcoming fear is often romanticized as the moment you stormed out of the office and told your boss to F off. Most of the time, fear is not that exciting. Fear can also be healthy. There’s a reason we have it and that’s because the people who have observed their sense of fear have survived.

    That being said, I’m battling a few fears. One is that my life will be lost in obscurity and my days will melt away in a sea of cubicles. It’s a slow, dull fear that isn’t felt over the minutes but more over the years.

    I’m battling another fear that keeps me swimming in the sea of cubicles. This fear has prevented me from quitting my job without being prepared to do something else.

    The acknowledgement of the two fears has allowed me to understand my position and move forward. I’m developing my ‘side hustle’ while continuing to produce at work. Hopefully, this will eventually lead me to my goals and overcoming my fears!

  18. After multiple dissapointments trying to have a family I followed a lead (literally an answer to prayer) that led us to a young woman seeking to find a home for the child she was carrying. She came and lived with us for 5 1/2 months and blessed us with a beautiful boy who would be the first of 4 children by adoption. Each venture has been a scary and rewarding journey challenging us to trust in the unknown. Our lives have been enriched beyond measure as a result. This journey began 18 years ago and is still an adventure in process!
    Plus we have the joy of remaining close to my son”s birthmother and the family she now has. It was scary stepping out into the unknown, but I am SO GLAD we did. How different our lives would have been if we hadn’t.

  19. The only magazine you subscribe to? Maybe you need to do more reading! Haha. Looking forward to the download. What a great feeling it is. it’s all in how we use it.

  20. I just put in my resignation at my job of almost 7 years. Fear kept me there for years. I’ve been trying to get all my ducks in a perfect row in order to quit but came to the realization that perfection was not going to happen, I needed to take the jump. My last day is in 3 weeks and as of now I don’t have another job lined up, it’s my leap of faith! I’ve been relieved and excited ever since I told my boss, and everyone (including my boss) have all been fully supportive of my decision. Once I receive my vacation payout I will be debt free too, who would’ve ever thought!

  21. I totally agree…the older I’ve gotten the more I’ve put that advice into action! It’s not enough to just exist.

    At some point in all of our lives well wish we did something unless we go ahead and do it now…its never too late!

  22. WOW.. what a fantastic topic!!! I think a lot of people either fear failure or fear the unknown. I always say, the worst that could happen is that it doesn’t work out, but there are so many different opportunities for everyone that it really isn’t a big deal if you fail. Just pick yourself up and move on. Glad to see you posting, hope to see more soon!!!

  23. I overcame fear by experiencing events that I thought I could not handle. A spouse’s heart attack, sitting with a parent as he died. Both events would have frightened me beyond reason in my early years, but having gone through such events, I learned to appreciate life and live it and not let fears of what could be prevent me from enjoying each day. Each moment truly is a gift.

  24. I was terrified that pregnancy or childbirth would kill me. How did I overcome it? By getting pregnant and praying the whole ordeal through.

  25. I am so glad you and your family are being spotlighted in this amazing magazine! I came across your blog from yahoo. It was such an inspiration for what I cam currently trying to achieve in my personal life! It’s great that their are outlets such as Fear.Less to showcase people doing great things !!! Well Wishes to you and your family !!!

  26. I love your website and I love this topic! I guess my fear would me feeling like I’m stuck. I wish I could travel the world but I don’t really think that’s possible.

  27. Congratulations on the interview and being published. As humans we tend to fear change, good or bad, and I’m glad you are helping people see that it is important to overcome this fear – especially in light of getting out of debt

  28. Fear.less is also the only magazine subscription that I have. Very inspirational.

    I loved how you said that the community and the message got featured in Fear.less instead of saying just you and Courtney.

    Keep rocking!

  29. I don’t think I can limit my fear moments to just one that is most pronounced. All through my life I’ve pushed myself to what I thought was my limit, faced the fear and pushed on through it. Of course saying this in a comment just can’t get across the fortitude it takes to overcome that amount of fear. What discourages me is watching people so afraid of fear that they never take any chances and try to live a safe life without ever reaching.

  30. Pingback: What Are Your Personal and Financial Goals? | DINKS Finance

  31. well i haven’t actually quit my day job yet – but with your previous article about it being ok to make a new decision, i’ll put down a step by step plan that i’m following through now. In six months, i will quit this job and venture out on my own! Thank you for your wonderful inspirational articles.. Keep it going!

  32. Your blog posts are perfectly timed. It is so awesome to know that you are touching and changing many lives in a totally unique way. Your approach to debt, life, and dreams is so “every day,” it feels like taking advice from a long time trusted friend. Continued Blessings, Peace and Prosperity!


  33. A’right, overcoming the fear of changes is essential for any person. Once you understand that, you’ll never become frightened again.

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