We’ve had an amazing week this week (testing out a daily post schedule) and we wanted to take time out on Friday to share some amazing videos that inspired a fun week!

As it turns out, many of these videos fall into the “Do What You Love” category of things.

If you enjoy inspiring round-ups like this, let us know, and we’ll do them more often!

The Happy Secret to Better Work…

Likely my favorite TED talk ever I watched just this week from Shawn Achor. Even cooler is the fact that this was a TEDx talk in Bloomington, IN (close to my hometown).

It’s fast-paced, short, *hilarious*, and hits home hard. Everything I love in an inspiration speech. If you only watch one thing this weekend – make it this!

Exercising Around the World…

My good friend and fitness nerd extraordinare, Steve Kamb, has spent the last 18 months of his life traveling around the world (a feat made possible by his unwavering commitment to helping thousands get in shape).

While traveling Steve maintained his fitness with bodyweight exercises in some of the most popular landmarks in the places he visited. 18 months later, we’re left with the inspiring combination of all those workouts.

A Man Who Clearly *Loves* His Work…

I first saw this on Reddit, but fell in love with it immediately. It’s a simple scene featuring an man who worked for years with artifacts from the Titanic.

You can certainly tell he’s a scientific man, someone who appears extremely intelligent, but as he speaks you can feel the passion for his work just oozing out of him. Wouldn’t it be great for all of us to have this level of passion for our work (no matter what it is)? I love it!

Cello Wars Lightsaber Duel…

Joan’s inspiration for the week came from a Youtube Star Wars parody. It’s not a new video, but one her family has viewed countless times for inspiration.

The video was put together over 6 months, mostly at night after families went to bed, by just a few dedicated musicians and videographers. It now has almost 6 million views. Joan has begun following the small crew’s journey to quit their jobs and make music (and videos) full time.

*****

What article or video inspired you this week?

Which of the above videos was your favorite?

I love Danielle LaPorte.

In a sea of experts talking about careers, entrepreneurship, passion, and life… she’s different.

She taught me to be genuine, unique, and passionate – no matter how difficult the process would be. And I owe her big time for that.

Once upon a time, Danielle charged hundreds of dollars (and then thousands of dollars) for one-on-one, in-your-face, no-holds-barred consulting conversations that rocked the worlds of people who had no idea what they had signed up for.

I had one of those conversations with Danielle once – and I walked away with a totally different view of my life and business.

Good news, though. She’s now boiled down all the wisdom from her website, speeches, poems, and one-on-one sessions into a single book.

The Fire Starter Sessions by Danielle LaPorte is now available for preorder.

I rarely suggest you buy a book. But this is the exception. You will love this one.

It’s different, unique, and in a style that both entertains and shocks the system with dozens of a-ha moments. (I think I averaged one a-ha moment per page of the book!)

If you took a highlighter to this book – the entire thing would be yellow!

One of my favorite things about The Fire Starter Sessions is what Danielle calls the “Burning Questions” in Chapter 4 (around page 80).

As I read the questions in the book, I remembered Danielle’s voice asking me them on the phone. Even now, it’s fun to see how my answers and perspective have changed over the years.

Question #1:  When someone at a party asks you “What Do You Do,” what do you say?  And how do you feel when you say it?

Wowzers, did this one hit me hard at different points in my life. I’ve always hated the “What Do You Do” question – even if I fall back on it myself in awkward situations at times.

I never had a good answer, because I always lacked confidence. And when I say “good” answer, I mean good to me. I never had an answer my own self was proud of.

When I admitted how I really felt when I answered – and how I always talked in circles explaining what I did – it clicked that something was wrong. I started not only changing how I answered, but what I actually did.

Question #2:  When do you feel powerful, passionate, free, incredibly useful, excited, inspired?

This was another tough, tough question for me to answer honestly at first. But the more I ask myself, the better I get at honing in on those times.

This is now the first piece of advice I give to anyone who comes to me and is “dead inside” from years and years of work that suffocates and traps them. Many have been out of tune with their positive, powerful, or free feelings for so long they can’t even remember them!

However, if you can be honest and up-front when you feel at your utmost best in life – you’ll have a big, blinking light guiding you toward your passion.

Question #3:  What’s chronic, repetitive, or inflamed in your inner or outer life?

Yikes, now we are getting deep.

Every major hurdle I’ve had in my business or life has been directly related to honestly identifying an inflamed or chronic habit, person, or ideal that has plagued my progress. Seriously, every instance I can remember.

I don’t like dwelling on the negative, but this question is about more than just complaining on the symptoms. This bites down to the problem itself.

When I’m honest about what’s really out-of-whack (specifically, not generally) and take action to break away from it – well, it’s painful up front – but oh so freeing after that.

Question #4:  What’s always in the back of your mind?

The back of my mind is a scary, scary place.

Like really scary.

But it’s also where my true passions, dreams, and ability to impact to others nestles most of the time.

As a society, we are taught to conform. To push our outside-the-box, scary, and uncomfortable ideas and values to the back of our minds.

Danielle helped give me permission to examine what’s been back there (sometimes for years). And I owe her big time for that!

*****

These are just 4 of almost a dozen burning questions in just one chapter of The Fire Starter Sessions.

It’s slammed with life-changing tidbits. It’s well worth the small investment and well worth your time reading it.

Oh, and for a final shot of inspiration, here’s Danielle’s “Credo for Making it Happen” video (brilliant):

This thing will make you want to kick ass and take names – in whatever project you want to tackle next.

Pick one of the questions in this post and answer it in the comments:

• When someone at a party asks you “What Do You Do,” what do you say?
• When do you feel powerful, passionate, free, incredibly useful, excited, inspired?
• What’s chronic, repetitive, or inflamed in your inner or outer life?
• What’s always in the back of your mind?
  

Go ahead, pick one. Let me know your answer!

That’s right, folks. It’s time to announce the next big project around here.

I’m partnering with my good friend and amazing storyteller Grant Peelle to film, create, and distribute a full-length documentary.

The working title is I’m Fine, Thanks and we’re exploring the plague of complacency in everyday life.

In laymen’s terms, we want to dig into why so many of us WILLINGLY compromise our dreams and passions as we get older in exchange for a routine, scripted life. AND, we want to feature why it’s never been more important to make those dreams more of a priority in our lives moving forward.

We’ve alluded to this struggle dozens of times on Man Vs. Debt and it played a huge role in my recent TEDx Talk. I’m completely stoked to take this to the next level with the documentary.

How are we going to pull this off?

We’ve compiled a documentary team of 5 to tour the country for 6 weeks.

We’ll have Grant (director and lead), me (for my good looks), two cameramen, and a sound professional. I’ll introduce the other members of the crew more in a later post.

Our new production company is called Crank Tank Studios, and we’ll be updating various aspects of the documentary and project on the Crank Tank Facebook page (I’ll do some big updates here, but that Facebook page is the best place to follow all the updates of the filming process).

We’re going coast-to-coast starting later this month from:

• Ohio (starting next week)
• NYC (2/27-3/1)
• Washington D.C. (3/2)
• Asheville (3/5)
• Austin, TX (SxSw)
• Grand Canyon (3/12)
• Phoenix (3/13)
• San Diego (3/15)
• L.A. (3/16-3/17)
• San Francisco (3/19-3/20)
• Portland (3/22-3/23)
• Seattle (3/26)
• Vancouver (3/29)
• Yellowstone (3/31)
• Back to the midwest

Sound familiar?

That’s because it just so happens to be almost exactly the route we followed in the RV!

Only issue is this time Courtney and Milli won’t be joining us (I’m sorry to let everyone down!).

Who is going to be in the film (maybe you)?

We’ll be sitting down with experts, bloggers, authors – as well as everyday families and people we meet along the way. Here are some of the personalities we have confirmed:

• Chris Guillebeau
• Jonathan Fields
• Nik Tarascio
• Danielle LaPorte
• Steve Kamb
• Pam Slim
• Pat Flynn
• L.A. Homeless Program
• Hundreds of people at SxSw
• Dozens of families and individuals along the way

And these are only the people we’ve confirmed dates for. We’re still emailing people this week to schedule times!

But here’s the most important thing…

We want your input!

Leave a comment here or email me at Baker@ManVsDebt.com and let me know your suggestions. We’re still finalizing the list and would love your input.

We’re looking for experts and personalities to provide perspective, but we’re also looking for everyday people.

We’re especially interested in people who feel trapped from years of putting off their dreams. People who’ve built a decent life, but feel they’ve sold out their passions for a scripted life.

Is that you? Let us know, we’d love to talk with you!

The Kickstarter Campaign…

We’re planning on running a Kickstarter campaign for the film in early April.

For those of you who don’t know, Kickstarter is a website and community that helps fund creative projects. You set a goal for funds needed to complete a project, outline the details, and set different creative rewards for people who pledge specific amounts to help accomplish the goal.

Kickstarter is absolutely exploding and is a perfect fit for a documentary project like this.

In fact, a couple weeks ago, Grant and I filmed a sample Kickstarter video we were considering launching BEFORE the road trip. After consideration, we decided that most people would really enjoy seeing the actual footage from the personalities in the film and the road trip itself.

For that reason, we decided we’d wait until at least the halfway point of the trip to create a trailer for the film and launch our Kickstarter campaign. This meant we had to assemble a team to help with the upfront cost of travel, tons of gear, and paying a staff of professionals… but the trade-off is well worth it.

Trust me, you’ll know when our Kickstarter goes live in early April – but in the meantime you can check out a fun video Grant and I shot about the topic for a potential campaign (we won’t be using this, but I knew many of you would really enjoy it):

10 ways you can help bring the documentary to life…

In order to make this happen, we need YOUR help.

1. Nominate a person or family for us to interview for the documentary.
2. Nominate YOURSELF as available to talk to us for the documentary (don’t be shy, do it!).
3. Help us find lodging in New York City from February 27th through March 1st… Yikes!
4. Help us find lodging in Austin, TX during SxSw… Double Yikes!
5. Host a documentary crew of 5 really nice guys for a night in a city we’re filming in.
6. Help us find a unique and creative place to film while in your city.
7. Help us schedule a fun event, attraction, or experience while in your city (or along our route).
8. Submit your music or work for use in the movie soundtrack.
9. Like Crank Tank Studios on Facebook (we’ll be sharing updates from the road).
10. Join the Crank Tank Street Team (by email) here.

We’re going to need a lot of connections to make this documentary shine.

Here’s how to reach us:

• Email me here:  Baker@ManVsDebt.com
• Fill out this form if you think you can help the trip along the way.
• Here’s the form for musicians and artists who might be interested in contributing to the soundtrack.

As always, I’ll owe you guys a lot for your help with the project.

No idea is too big or small. Reach out, we’d love to hear from you!

Premiere in July!…

With an intense production schedule (from the full crew), we plan to premiere this in early July.

We’ll be using a very open, low-cost model for distribution. A digital, HD download of the film will be only $5.

We really want as many people as possible to have their eyes opened by this message.

I plan on things being normal around here, even while I’m on the road. I’m taking my podcast gear, will continue to write posts and updates, and am excited to meet up with as many of you as possible again.

This is a big undertaking for Man Vs. Debt (and for me), but I’m super excited.

Special thanks to Courtney, whom is fully supporting me leaving for more than a month, missing our anniversary and her birthday, all while she’s 7 months pregnant. When I say that having a supportive family and spouse is one of the most important factors for success… I mean it.

More updates soon, but buckle your seat belts… this is going to be a fun ride!

Xoxoxo,

-Baker

I’m extremely excited to share with you a talk I gave as part of TEDx here in Asheville a little over a month ago. Some of my favorite online sources of inspiration are TEDx Talks, so I was honored to be invited to give one myself!

I spent a lot of time planning and preparing what I believed to be the most powerful and concise version of our message here at Man Vs. Debt. I’m extremely pleased with how it turned out!

It revolves around finding your own answer to one powerful, life-changing question.

It’s less than 20-minutes long. I think you’ll love it!

Note: I have a deep passion for speaking and would love to add a couple more events to my 2012 speaking schedule! If you know of any opportunities, conferences, or events – don’t hesitate to reach out to me. You can email me directly at Baker(at)ManVsDebt.com.

What did you think?

Let me know in the comments below!

I’ve written a lot about our own journey to redefine freedom over the last few years. But this community is so powerful because it’s made up of thousands of stories of people chasing their own dreams.

We’ve shared some of these stories before – and I’m always ecstatic to shine the spotlight. I’ve got another great story for you today.

Dustin Koester (in the picture above) has been a long-time member of the Man Vs. Debt community. In fact, he’s been around longer than any of you!

You see, he was part of the community before it even started. Dustin’s a life-long friend of mine – and responsible for almost every graphic (including the very first logo) and design you see on Man Vs. Debt or our guides/courses.

Dustin’s great at graphic design and helping as a creative consultant on projects, but that’s not what he was born to do.

Dustin was born to play the drums.

In elementary and middle school, that’s an acceptable dream. All of us encourage it, foster it, and support it. You want to play drums? Great… go for it… do it!

So throughout this time, Dustin played in a band with his friends from middle school. Their parents helped fund the gear. They played after school all evening. They even recorded and burnt CDs of their first “album”. Dustin was widely known for his talent as a drummer amongst his peers and fellow students.

But as we get older, high school rolls around. In high school, playing drums in a band can be “cool,” but we’re slowly taught that it’s not realistic to try and play drums to make a living. There’s still a fading glimmer of hope left… the possibility of trying to get into a specialized college or program still exits.

Dustin continued to play in a band throughout High School and played drums in the marching band, jazz band, and show choir competitions. His talent was obvious for anyone to see, yet there was still an underlying force pushing Dustin away from drumming.

Society’s real message was clear: Keep playing drums for fun, but it’s time to find a career or job that’ll pay the bills.

As we graduate high school and move onto college, that message is pounded over and over to us. The dreams that were acceptable and encouraged as kids are now shoved to the back burner. “It’s the responsible thing to do,” we tell ourselves.

Dustin went along with everyone else to college (Indiana University to be exact). At college, Dustin struggled to find that “responsible career” he was suppose to be working towards. As he was pushed and pulled from one focus to another, there was one consistent factor in the chaos…

Drumming.

Dustin joined the respected “Big Red Basketball Band” and continued to play in a college rock band at the bars and clubs on the weekends. When life got hectic, scattered, or confusing… drumming was Dustin’s constant.

After college, Dustin did what everyone else does – tried to find a job. He worked several, from Barista to Graphic Designer, from Security System Installer to Substitute Teacher. He got an apartment, bought some things, and tried to “settle” in.

But something wasn’t right.

This life path he was on didn’t feel like his own. He was trying to do everything he was suppose to. Get decent grades. Go to college. Find a career. Get a steady job. He was doing his best, but none of this was what he really wanted to do.

He really wanted to drum.

It was a simple realization, but one that changed the course of his life.

Not too long after, a friend of a band he was playing in mentioned his brother was a talent agent who booked musicians for cruise ships. With a spark of interest, Dustin asked for more information – and two weeks later he was auditioning for his first gig.

Over the next few years, Dustin would travel the world doing what he loved… playing the drums. He lived and played on cruise ships with destinations all over the map:

• Italy
• France
• Greece
• Turkey
• Portugal
• Spain
• Egypt
• Tunisia
• Sicily
• Monaco
• Ukraine
• Bulgaria
• Croatia
• Malta
• Alaska
• Canada
• Mexico
• Colombia
• Costa Rica
• Panama
• Bahamas

All along the way he was housed (more on this later), fed, and paid to travel the world and perform.

It’s not an opportunity for everyone – Dustin’s the first to admit that. He had to get rid of a lot of his stuff and start focusing on his finances to make the shift possible. For him, he welcomed the added flexibility to chase his dreams.

In between cruise ships, Dustin also was given the opportunity to travel the US and fill in on the Jesus Christ Superstar Nat’l Tour. He’s met hundreds of fellow professional entertainers, musicians, and industry professionals along his travels.

His journey to chase his dreams and follow his passion for drumming is just getting started. But his mindset about what’s possible has completely changed.

More from Dustin’s Point of View…

How long have you been drumming?

I started playing drums in 5th grade when my dad bought himself a drum set. Although I played guitar at the time, drums quickly stole all my attention.

When did you realize drumming was your biggest passion?

Honestly, not until recently. It’s always been an interest of mine, but it’s taken a while to realize the severity of my involuntary dedication. There’s an indescribable feeling – It’s the only place in the world where I feel completely confident, and the notion of time just disappears. At the risk of sounding like a hippie…it’s like I’m in another dimension.

How did you get started with the Cruise Ship opportunity?

I was sitting in with a friend’s cover band and after the gig we were all hanging out & talking. A friend of the band mentioned that his brother was a talent agent who booked musicians for cruise ships. About 2 weeks later I got in touch with him, he got in touch with his brother, and I had an over-the-phone audition scheduled for the next week to join my first ship later that month.

What’s your favorite part of the process (traveling and drumming)?

I really enjoy the traveling aspect of the cruise gigs. It makes me feel on top of my game when I’ve got a company flying me from place to place and staying in hotels all around the world before joining the ships. It’s also part of that surreal period where I’m realizing ‘I’m about to live on a ship for X months…again.”

What’s your least favorite part of life on a Cruise Ship?

My least favorite part of the cruise life is the housing. The rooms are quite small, but that’s to be expected, I guess. In general, what goes on behind the scenes on a cruise ship would turn a lot of people off to the cruise industry. It’s like any of your large Vegas hotels – it’s all glitz and glamour on the floor, but behind the scenes it’s business as usual.

Would you recommend it to another entertainer/musician/crew member?

I would recommend it to anyone who has a passion for traveling…and not everyone does. It’s certainly a different lifestyle for a musician onboard a ship and some don’t prefer it, but if you want to see the world and get paid while doing so, cruise ships are a great introductory way to do that.

How would you suggest someone getting started… do you have any tips for someone wanting to do this?

The best way to get started is to audition with an agency. Mine is Landau Music, Inc. which operates out of Pasadena, California. Larger group auditions are usually held at Universities and sometimes auditions can be held over the phone. The best way to be prepared for an audition is to have your sight-reading skills to a point where you’re very confident going in, and to also be familiar with a lot different styles.

What made you submit to be in the Queen Extravaganza Contest?

The curiosity, really. It’s an ongoing internal conflict, wondering how you fare against other players…and I thought this would be a great contest to experiment with. I love Queen’s timeless music and my genre of choice to play has always been rock – big moves, heavy playing – its what has come most naturally to me over the years. So I thought…”What the hell. Let’s see where it takes me.”

4-Hour Workweek Giveaway…

Lastly, I have 5 more copies of Tim Ferris’ best-selling book The 4-Hour Workweek, Revised and Expanded Edition that have been sitting around for nearly a year.

It’s time to pass them along to those of you looking to chase your own dreams!

What dream have you been pushing to the back of your mind?

What passion have you been sacrificing?

What dream do you want to chase?

Leave a comment below!

*****

“Laura, did you hear about Steve Jobs?”

“Yeah, I can’t believe it. I’m surprised at how sad I am really. It sucks.”

“Me too. It feels like my favorite musician died, you know? I feel a weird connection…”

*****

I was surprised last night to hear Steve Jobs passed away.

As I watched the tweets pour in, this is what I came away with:

Seriously, when’s the last time we cared this much about the leader of a billion dollar company?

People around the U.S. are getting together and protesting greed, excess, and bloated corporations as we speak… yet we celebrate this man who ran one of the largest, most powerful brands we’ve ever seen.

What did he do so different?

The answer may be in a video tweeted out by Richard Branson last night. It’s a 1997 Apple commercial narrated by Steve Jobs himself:

Or maybe the answer can be hidden in what I consider one of the most motivating videos on the internet (Steve’s commencement speech at Stanford):

Or maybe we can find the answer in this simple quote:

“Being the richest man in the cemetary doesn’t matter to me… Going to bed at night saying we’ve done something wonderful… that’s what matters to me.” -Steve Jobs (WSJ 1993)

Steve Jobs inspired millions to change the world.

In honor of Steve, here are my two new life goals:

I will help one million people get out of debt.

I will raise one billion dollars for charity.

Over the last three years, I can point to at least 100 emails of people who’ve claimed we’ve helped them in whole or part get completely out of debt. I will record the names of each person, all the way to one million.

I’ve also helped raise $45,500 for charity so far through this blog and other online avenues. Before I’m done this will be $1,000,000,000.

The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world… 

Are the ones who do.

How will you change the world?

*****

Jonathan Fields’ new book Uncertainty: Turning Fear and Doubt into Fuel for Brilliance is being unleashed into the world!

In the video review above, I share my honest feelings about the book along with my two major takeaways from consuming it over the weekend.

Note: Today is the very last day to take advantage of special pre-order bundles available at the book’s website. Tomorrow is the official launch (these offers go away)!

Uncertainty is something we all deal with.

Anytime we attempt a major life change, we face uncertainty. Anytime we attempt to solve a problem with creativity, we face uncertainty.

We all face uncertainty, but most of us go about this in the wrong way!

We attempt to eliminate uncertainty from our lives. We try to get to a point of absolutely certainty before we take action.

But if we wait around for a moment where we have complete certainty… we end up doing NOTHING!

Anything in life worth doing is going to involve massive levels of uncertainty.

If Jonathan has taught me only one thing, it’s that action in the face of uncertainty is the path to a fulfilling life. In fact, it’s a requirement of a fulfilling life.

Here’s a recap of my takeaways from Uncertainty:

• Major Takeaway #1: Our fear of being judged is keeping us from living the life that we know is possible. We must take concrete steps to counteract this. (Jonathan covers these early in the book.)

• Major Takeaway #2: 90% of the fear and doubt of a life change exists only in our heads. You’ll always have some uncertainty, but a few simple questions can dissolve the majority of it almost immediately. (This comes later in the book.)

Jonathan’s three questions (Chapter 9: Own The Story Line)…

My favorite part of the entire book happens in Chapter 9 towards the end.

Jonathan suggests that when we’re faced with any decision or major life change, we need to ask ourselves the following:

1. Question 1: “What if I go to Zero?” — Write down the worst possible outcome of trying and failing. Be realistic, but be honest.
2. Question 2: “What if I do nothing?” – Write everything that’ll stay the same if you take NO action to change.
3. Question 3: “What if I succeed?” – Write down what would happen if you DID accomplish the change or shift in your life. Be as specific as possible.

Whether or not you can get your hands on a copy of Uncertainty, I challenge you to apply Jonathan’s 3 questions to a big decision or change in your own life.

Write down (on paper) your answers to each of the 3 questions.

For me, I didn’t even have to spend time looking at the answers. Just the process of writing down my answers immediately dissolved 90% of the fear and doubt I had attached to a recent decision.

It was almost all in my head!

Give the exercise a try – and I strongly recommend you grab a copy of Uncertainty and read it this weekend.

For more information check out Jonathan’s raw, inspiring book trailer…

[Can't view the video? Click here for more info (and to watch it in your browser)...]

It’s one of my top three books for anyone who has to creatively solve problems in business or life. And I’m guessing you probably fall into that category.

Jonathan Fields is a brilliant man.

Uncertainty is a brilliant book.

How do you currently deal with uncertainty in your life?

*****

Note: Let me know what you think of the video above! It’s a sample daily video (Day 5) from the new 6-week You Vs Debt class that opens early next week!

There are hundreds of factors that weigh into the success of a change.

But time and time again, I’m convinced that one single factor outweighs all the others:

The support and excitement of a respected loved one!

I know for sure that the financial changes I’ve made, the growth of this community, or any of the strides I’ve made in person freedom and creativity wouldn’t have been possible without the support and excitement of Courtney.

It’s really that simple.

Courtney’s support has been the #1 factor in every positive change I’ve made in the last 5 years.

Now, don’t let me paint you a rose-colored picture here. Most times we don’t start on the same page. Many times getting to the same page isn’t the prettiest in the world. We are far, far away from being the perfect family or couple.

But we have found a way to prioritize being on each others’ bandwagon.

If Courtney believes deeply in something (and I’m aware enough to know that), I try to do my best to be her #1 supporter and fan. It may not happen overnight, but we are well aware of how important this support is in our lives!

But I know from experience that things don’t always go smoothly…

In addition to learning from our own mistakes, I’ve heard from hundreds and hundreds of readers of the last few years with similar hiccups.

Sometimes our own excitement and values can be so far apart from our loved ones that we can feel completely alone.

But that’s rarely the actual case. And in these vulnerable moments many times we can find ourselves scapegoating our loved ones:

“I’m ready for change, but my husband just won’t help me out…”

“We’d turn around our finances, but with three young kids in school we just have too much responsibility to do ____________.”

“My friends don’t get it…”

Some or all of these statements may be true in your life.

But it’s my experience that it’s easy to blame others than realize just how much control we DO have in our own lives.

I read a quote – or truth of sorts – a couple years ago and it stuck with me.

“The meaning of any communication is the response it elicits.”

I love this way of thinking, because it returns the responsibility for results back onto me. If Courtney doesn’t give me the response or support I’m looking for, it’s very likely a result of poor communication on my part.

This may not be true ALL of the time, but it’s definitely been true MOST of the time for me.

With this paradigm in mind, here’s a recap of the 7 tips from the video:

1. Realize you can’t change another person…

You can force, manipulate, coerce and brainwash… but not forever.

In the long-term, you can’t force lasting change onto anyone else.

Lasting change comes from within.

Trying to quickly force a change in another person will always blow up in your face. It elicits a defensive reaction and turns conversations into arguments in the blink of an eye.

But that doesn’t mean you are hopeless.

You can encourage change. You can model healthy change. You can communicate, listen, and evolve with those you love.

But the first step in the process is to realize you can’t change them.

2. Allow change to happen at its own pace…

Once you’ve realized that you can’t force or rush change, you learn that you have to allow it to occur at its own natural pace.

You’ve experienced circumstances and influences that have ignited an excitement or an urgency for change.

How selfish is it to expect that any other person immediately experience that same level passion? You are different people with different ways of processing influences in your environments!

You’ve got to respect your loved one’s internal timeframe for an organic build up of excitement.

That’s a fancy way of saying be patient.

I’m not telling you to wait forever. I’m not telling you to accept a lack of action or effort.

I’m simply suggesting that real excitement and passion only grows when there is room for it to happen naturally for each person involved.

Patience, young grasshopper. Patience.

3. Start with why this is important to you…

Whenever you approach your spouse or loved one, frame the entire discussion with why this change is important to you.

Not why this change is the right path.

Not why this change must be done.

Not what has been done wrong.

Not what some other person has done better.

Start with why this is important to you.

Reach deep down. Find the vulnerable, open, honest reasons why why you are excited and passionate about this change.

Most importantly, be optimistic. Be happy.

There is a time and place for recognizing and learning from errors. Moving away from a painful moment can be a big motivator in your journey.

But not now. This is not the time for that.

Start with optimism.

Start with why it’s important to you.

4. Seek their input…

After you state why it’s important to you, seek their input.

Ask them what’s important to them about the topic or part of your life you’ve just talked about.

Don’t ask them what they think about what you said. This is a formula for them to take the opposite side and defend.

Instead, ask them what’s important to them about ___________.

Then stop talking.

Don’t interrupt. Don’t risk breaking the flow.

Listen.

When they are done, this is often times a great place to end the initial conversation. There’s nothing wrong with a short discussion of what’s important and then some time away to think.

5. Leverage outside experiences and influences…

If I know one thing for sure, it’s that I’m terrible at having a Teacher/Student relationship with Courtney.

It’s probably a combination of my ego and my tendency to get offended when I recognize naivety in my own actions – but I simply don’t handle it well.

I can be taught by others. I do it all the time.

I love learning from a wide variety of sources…  just as long as that source is NOT Courtney!

All joking aside, it’s extremely difficult for most of us to swallow instruction or correction from someone we are that close with. We want those people to respect us so deeply that we completely block the potential to learn and grow from their experiences.

A great way to avoid this conflict is to leverage outside influences to help:

• Take a class together. Courtney and I did this at the beginning of our financial turnaround.
• Watch a documentary or movie about that topic. This is our method of choice for many healthy eating and food-related issues.
• Send them an article, post, or recording. “Honey, check out this article I loved on ___________.”

Allowing them to leverage external influences will often make it far easier for people to accept responsibility for the new change!

6. Lead by example…

Even with the tips and suggestion on this list, one conversation isn’t going to magically cure all your woes.

Remember, this takes time. Open, honest conversations will help go a long way to building that foundation, but you may still have some patience to practice as your loved ones build that excitement.

While they come around, you don’t have to be sitting by idling.

Lead by example.

Take action. Model the behavior and the baby steps toward change that you are so passionate about.

If it’s financial change you are after, start tracking your own spending. Get your hands on a couple great books on the topic. Enroll in a course or class and start your journey.

Don’t force feed your loved ones, but show them with ACTION that you are serious and committed.

Hearing your words is nice, but seeing you walk the walk can inspire in a way words can’t.

7. Make it a family routine…

Last, but certainty not least, get the whole family involved in this process.

Make it a game. Make it fun, quirky, and interesting.

One of the best ways to get a spouse on board is to encourage yourself to include the kids.

The best example from my own life is when Courtney and I work out. Often times we’ll follow videos like P90X or Insanity and we almost always have Milligan do them with us.

Obviously, she just jumps around and rolls on the floor (and sometimes gets in the way at the WORST possible times), but her effect on motivation is significant.

If Courtney casually says “Milli and I are going to do today’s P90X video…” I’m about 500 times more likely to jump in and do it with them. If Courtney just goes to do it herself, I’ll sometimes her myself justifying “Oh go ahead, I’ll do it later on at a more convenient time for me…”

Yeah, right. That ends up happening about 10% of the time.

The simple fact is I’m much more likely to participate when I know it’s a family activity we are doing together.

This works to help get older kids involved, as well.

If kids see that both parents are on board with a goal or mission, they are FAR more likely to have excitement for the activity or change.

Even Milligan is willing to give half of her toys to the garage sale if she sees that Mommy and Daddy are all putting their stuff in the sale, too.

YOUR CHALLENGE (DON’T SKIP THIS)…

You know I’ve been on a big action kick lately, and this post is no different.

These tips are useless, unless you take action to apply at least one of them in your life today.

At the end of the video, I challenged You Vs Debt members to…

Schedule a 20-minute block of time to have a conversation with a loved one in your life.

You Vs Debt member or not, I want YOU to do this exercise.

Here are your ground rules for this conversation:

1. 100% Distraction Free – No screens are are allowed in a 10 foot radius. No televisions, cell phones, computers, etc… It’s only 20 minutes, you can do it.
2. Low stress and not tired – Ensure the conversation happens at a time that is low stress (unwind from work or business), but also when you aren’t tired (not right as you lay your head down at night).
3. Lead with WHY it’s important to you – Remember tip #3. Start the conversation with why it’s important to you and then LISTEN.
4. Never say “YOU” or “YOUR” – These two words are BANNED from the entire conversation. No exceptions.

Put this post to use in your life.

Schedule a 20-minute conversation for sometime this weekend.

Share your experience and tips below…

I’ve mapped out everything I’ve learned from talking with hundreds of people over the last few years, but I want YOUR experience as well.

Have you had success getting on board with a spouse or loved one recently?

How do you rally your loved ones?

Share your frustrations, experience, and/or tips below with others!…

*****

Today is an exciting day for me. We’re one week out from the opening of my new You Vs Debt class – and to celebrate I’ve decided to share a few sample daily lessons and resources this week with you!

The first week of the six week You Vs Debt class is all about “Motivation & Mindset.”

As we talked about in my last post, this is an extremely important topic that many financial experts simply shy away from. We dig into the numbers of personal finance starting in Week 2, but not before we lay a foundation of excitement, passion, and commitment.

The key metaphor that guides us through this first week is that of The Rider, The Elephant, and The Path – a great construct laid out in the book Switch by Chip and Dan Heath.

Essentially they describe our emotional mind to be like a huge elephant – slow, deliberate, and powerful. Our logical mind is the rider on top tasked with constantly guiding the elephant through the jungle towards a desired destination.

How do most of us try to get this elephant through the jungle?

We force it. We grab the reigns and try to ram this beast straight through the shortest path possible!

We fight, we struggle… we tire, we sore, and finally… we exhaust.

“WILLPOWER!” We scream at the top of our lungs… but it’s no use. We simply can’t keep up the stamina to constantly overpower the elephant.

Is it any wonder most of us burn out when attempting to change a tough habit?

Willpower alone is not enough…

Instead of constantly exhausting ourselves trying to micromanage our journey, Chip and Dan Health suggest we:

1. Direct the rider – First, we need to give our logical minds clarity above all else. We need to know specifically what we are doing and where we are going. This helps us overcome the fear of uncertainty (a huge source of resistance in our logical brains) – and gives us the guidance to make small course corrections when needed.
2. Motivate the elephant – This is where so many of us fail. You shouldn’t be motivating the rider (what most of us try first) – you need to motivate the huge, powerful beast you’re riding! By switching your motivation to feed your emotional mind – you’ll ensure that the elephant wants to come along for the ride. You’ll no longer be caught in a constant power struggle – and won’t burn out nearly as quickly.

This subtle shift to motivate my emotional mind over my logical mind has completely changed the way I approach change in my life.

But the last part of Chip and Dan’s jungle metaphor may be the most important.

They remind us that you can also Shape The Path that the rider and the elephant take through the jungle. This means crafting a positive, supporting environment and removing any negative potholes, obstacles and predators in your way.

Shaping the path makes the journey easier on both parts of our minds. Our emotional mind can push forward without many hurdles – and our logical mind can make small adjustments if we begin to wander off the path at any point.

You Vs. Debt Sneak Peek…

And this is where we find ourselves on Day 4 of the You Vs. Debt class framework. Having just covered how to motivate our emotional minds and direct our logical minds, we’re ready to craft our environment to help support the journey.

Take a sneak peek at a sample lesson and challenge from Day 4:

[Can't see the video? Click here to watch it in your browser!]

Additional Resources:

• Download the Day 4 Worksheet (to complete your challenge at the end of the video)
• Download the MP3
• Download the full transcript

Do This Challenge Today…

This sample lesson (and post) is useless if you don’t take action.

I want you to download this supplemental worksheet and fill it out.

Start by filling out your three levels of positive influences. Next, list the negative people and environments that are dragging you down.

After you are done share the following in the comments (if you are willing):

1. Share the #1 entity in your life that is dragging you down.
2. Share your #1 most empowering influence.
   

Sharing your answers in the comments below will help inspire others to take up the challenge!

Your financial life CAN change. And crafting your environment (or “shaping the path”) is an essential step in ensuring that this change will be long-term and sustainable.

I hope you enjoyed the sample lesson!  To unlock another couple lessons just like it, be sure you are on the You Vs Debt Insider’s list by filling out the form below this post!

Xoxoxo,

-Baker

*****

Yes, this headline is for real…

Last week, Courtney and I had the pleasure of crossing paths with another family on the road… The Denning Family.

Like us, the Dennings are on a road trip as a family.

Unlike us, they have 5 FREAKIN’ KIDS with them! Holy moly. And they aren’t just going around the U.S. – they are in route from Alaska (where they lived for a year) all the way down the west coast to… ARGENTINA.

To top it off, they are pulling this off in a veggie-powered truck (read: paying nothing for gas) and a rooftop tent to sleep in.

We were so impressed and inspired by our short time with the Denning family – I wanted to share their story with you.

Below, I sit down with Greg and Rachel – while Courtney wrangles 5 kids total (thanks honey!).

Additional information and video summary:

• Follow the Denning Family here: DiscoverShareInspire.com // Twitter // Facebook
• [00:00] - Introduction to Greg and Rachel
• [01:15] – Where the Dennings have been as a family (Mexico, Costa Rica, Dominican Republic, India, Canada, Alaska…)
• [02:05] – Ages of their five kids that travel with them (All under 8!)
• [02:50] – I ask the Dennings if they’re crazy – and if the lifestyle feels “strange” to them.
• [03:35] – Details on the Veggie-Powered Truck they are using for their roadtrip.
• [05:55] – How the Dennings can afford to travel (different from what we do)!
• [08:00] – Rachel and Greg’s top parenting tips for managing 5 kids on the road.
• [10:40] – What is the primary goal for the road trip?

Full transcript of the entire interview…

Hey everyone. This is Baker from Man Vs. Debt, and I am honored to be joined today with Greg and Rachel Denning, who—we’ve met a lot of people while we’ve been traveling along this road trip. But maybe—these guys have maybe the most unique story of them all. So I wanted to get them on camera while we’re spending a few days here in Redding, California, or outside of Redding, and share their story and get some of their expertise for what they’re doing.

So before I let them talk, I’m going to do so more talking. And that is, we get a lot of people that email or message us and say, “Hey, with so many people that are traveling and young, we really appreciate that you guys share your travels as a family.”

And so we’re very flattered when we’re able to do that, and sort of help other families realize that it’s possible. But even we need inspiration, and when we turn for inspiration, these are the type of families and the type of people that we turn to.

They don’t have just one kid. Not two kids, not three kids, not four kids. But they are doing this with five kids.

A family of seven, with five kids. And I guess, Greg, if you would, give us a quick recap of the last few years. We’ve talked about it, but I want to hear in your own words of where you guys have been. Just the quick version.

We got excited about travel, and Rach and I had a quick trip to Mexico. We both went, “Wow, we want to do this.” And so after our fourth child was born, we drove from the States down to Costa Rica. Lived there for a year. Then we moved and lived in the Dominican Republic, out in the Caribbean, which was fantastic.

After that, we ended up in India, and just loved that experience. Flew back from India while Rachel was pregnant with our fifth, and drove from Atlanta, Georgia, up to Homer, Alaska, where we spent the last year. So now we’re on our next adventure, which is Alaska to Argentina, to Tierra Del Fuego.

Yeah. So that’s why I wanted to get them on camera, for that specific reason. With four kids through most of that, now with the fifth, little baby Atlas, who is so cute. And what are the ages now, Rachel? What’s the breakdown?

Our oldest is Kyah; she is 8. And then Parker’s 7. Kimbell is 5, almost 6. Aaliyah’s 4, and then Atlas is eight months.

8, 7, 5, 4, and eight months. Correct? Wow, that is—I guess the follow up question to that is, “Are you crazy?”

Yes.

Serious question. Do you get that a lot?

Sometimes.

Do people really ask you? Do they see you, hear about what you’re doing, and they really—Honestly, do they check in to see if you’re a little loony?

Yeah. I think people think we’re a little strange sometimes.

It’s just so unconventional.

Is it really that strange though? So let’s get into this, ’cause I want to talk about this. We have people ask us this question too, and it’s not even close to the same scale of what you guys are doing. Does it feel strange, in day to day life for you?

No. To us it’s just, you know, you get up in the morning. You have breakfast, you get dressed, you—Except for us. Then we go to the beach or we go to the Redwood Forest, or we—

To Mt. St. Helen’s, or Rainer. Or today, up to the lake.

And I think that we’ve run into that same thing too. And I keep telling people, with life in the RV, because I want to get into what you guys are doing this most recent tour in. But people ask us all the time, when they see the RV, is “Can you do this for a long period of time?” And I always tell them, “After the first month, it was just life. And you adapt, and you learn how to live and operate in a small space, like the RV.”

Or even a smaller space, because you guys are actually doing this in a truck that has benches in the back for the kids, and a rooftop tent. So picture this: a truck and a rooftop tent. We think we need the RV, which is 31.5′ with a slide-out, a bathroom, kitchen sink. And here they are, making it happen, all the way from Alaska to Argentina, in just the truck. And not only is this a truck with a rooftop tent, this is a veggie powered truck, right?

That’s right, yeah.

Tell us a little bit about that, Greg. What—How in the world—We’re spending $1,000 to $1,500 in gas. And we just went to Shell before we got here to meet you guys, and filled it up for whatever, $220. Tell the Man Vs. Debt readers where you guys went to get your fuel before you got here.

So yesterday before we got here, we stopped at a restaurant. I walked back to their veggie bin. They had over 300 gallons of veggie. I took what we needed and what we could carry.

Well, explain what the veggie is.

It’s waste vegetable oil. They take it out of their fryers after they’ve cooked the fries or the chicken, whatever they’re doing. They take the waste vegetable oil, they throw it in their bins, and then we recycle it, put it in the truck. It costs me zero, in dollars, to get that. There’s an exchange rate. I have to work a little bit for it. Took me a half hour to get 30 gallons. It was the slow way, but we—

We filled up for $220. You stopped by a restaurant with half an hour of work and did the exact same thing.

Right.

And a lot of people, I hear—I hear about this a lot. But it really—the vision, my mind comes up with two hippie-type people going around to restaurants. It doesn’t strike me as a family of seven actually pulling this off. Where’d you get the idea from? Or have you always been passionate about this issue? Or did you just jump into it?

No. We bumped into it. And our whole life has been like that. We just meet great people along the road, and new ideas. And once your mind’s expanded to a new idea, you grab hold of it. And we had been toying with this idea of a long road trip, and we kind of solidified it: “Hey, Alaska to Argentina.” And then the idea came across, if you can do this on veggie. We thought, that’s thousands and thousands of dollars.

Yeah, probably approaching at least $10,000.

Yeah, it’s going to be huge.

I don’t know. I’d like to see the math on that. But yeah, that’s a huge thing. So let’s do. Let’s talk more about the finances. ‘Cause one of the questions I get a lot is, how you guys afford this lifestyle. And I work, work way too much, as a lot of Man Vs. Debt readers—I go back and forth. But we’re working and living on the road. While you guys have a slightly different system of—Well, I’ll let you guys explain it. How are you affording this trip?

I think our main philosophy is that we eliminate everything that we can that’s not essential for us. So that we free up the time and the money to do what we really want to do. So—and that’s why we went with the rooftop tent option and everything, is because we’re eliminating rent, we’re eliminating accommodation expenses. We can basically—

Eliminating gas.

Right. Basically living in our truck, but it gives us the freedom to go all the way to Argentina.

Yeah. And so primarily I guess what you did is, you guys—stage one is just to be ultra frugal, and to realize what’s important to you guys, spend money on that. Which we’ve talked about as well. But also just to eliminate these sort of expenses that people think are necessities when they’re traveling.

Like I said, we’re spending almost $1,500 a month. And it had Courtney and I scratching our heads to be like, “Wow, maybe we should’ve thought more about this” or “Maybe there are more ways that we can stretch ourselves,” when we heard about your guys’ story.

See, and we love to ask that question: “Is there a better way?” And you start questioning—We take our living expenses, and we’re like, “Is this the bare minimum?” And then you figure out, no it’s not. You can squeeze it, squeeze it. And so you give up some luxuries, some comforts.

But for us, with our priority—Hey, the trip’s our priority. Family time’s our priority. I can skip a little bit of comfort, luxury, here and here. Personally, I can give that up in order to say—[CROSSTALK]—time and other things so we can do what we really want to do. So we’ve gone totally frugal. And so our living expenses are cheap. So now when you find a way to cover those expenses, you get to do what you want to do.

And that’s great. And I want to now dive into what you just said about the family time. Because honestly, we’ve encountered this again in both the positive and negative of traveling families. And I might offend some people here. But a lot of times when we have—when we meet home schooled families, or we meet a lot of traveling families, at times the kids can be less than social. Or the parents themselves can be less than social. There can be some barriers there that we’ve seen in different families, and that we help—we’re taking strides to make sure that we’re healthy in that aspect.

But your kids—Seriously. This is not just because you’re sitting here—are so curious and so well-behaved, and really just amazing kids. So Courtney and I are looking at you guys, looking for parental tips. How do you guys travel, live so close together, and give the—What are your top parenting tips, is what I’m trying to get at. Because I really look up to you guys in that instance.

I think that one thing I always try to focus on with the kids is just personal responsibility and being concerned about being the kind of person you want to be. So if there’s some type of issue, I really focus on, “Are you acting how you want to be? Are you doing the kinds of things that are going to make you the person you want to be? And how do you feel right now? Do you feel good when you’re fighting with your brother or”—That’s my area of focus, really.

And is there one that sticks out for you?

Yeah. Rachel and I are really passionate about personal development, and trying to be our best selves. We’re aware of the stigma of social retardation or whatever. “Oh, no, you won’t be social. You’ve got this recluse.” You imagine this person that can’t communicate. We’re on a quest together. We’re passionate about personal development, and trying to make the most of ourselves. So we go about it with passion, and the kids follow along.

I was just going to say that.

And we encourage them. We’re outgoing. We love to meet people from all cultures and places and backgrounds and ages. And be able to interact with all of them, and learn from them, and grow and learn in every situation. So we’re passionate about education. We’re passionate about being people of influence that can make a difference in the world and just try to be good people.

Model that for your kids. Lead by example.

And they follow along.

Yeah.

And obviously this is a softball. But you guys believe that travel enhances that in your kids? And enhances that in yourselves?

Undoubtedly.

Which we do too. And again, I said that was a softball. But that’s sort of what Courtney and I keep coming back to, is I think that we think in general that travel is leading us, and then by in return Milligan, in the direction of where we want to grow as people.

Absolutely.

So that’s really great. So let’s talk a little bit of shop. Let’s talk a little bit about your guys’ site, ’cause I really like it, and that is discovershareinspire.com. Is that right? What is the goal now? Let me ask you this.

What’s the primary goal of your trip? Have you thought—That’s a tough question for us. What’s the primary goal of the trip from the West Coast, and literally the West Coast of the entire hemisphere, I guess. That’s what it is right?

The entire West Coast, yeah.

That’s awesome. What’s your guys’ primary goal?

It just started as what—we thought, “What do we want to do?” Based on the travel we’ve done, based on the experiences we’ve had, what are we really passionate about? And our thing is discovery. It’s really about that. We love going to new places and seeing what they have to offer and learning from it. But then we really tend to get bored after we’ve been there for too long. So we realized that we love that change. We love to—exploring new things. So when we thought about it, we were like, “Well, let’s just drive and keep driving”—

And just keep going south.

And keep going, yeah.

And share all the great things that the world has to offer. But if I can step back, it’s all priority. Our main focus is family closeness. We want a tight, close, growing, loving family that we become well-rounded, developed people and stay tight as a family. And so that priority’s important. That’s the basis of this discovery, sharing, and this travel. Hey, we’re going to do this trip, but the goal is just a solid family. So often, so many of us get distracted by work or other pursuits or hobbies or whatever it is. And so our main priority is that. How can we really do that and then tie in discovering, a desire to share. Always experience and then share it.

Yeah. So let’s take that. And Rachel, you’re I guess the primary writer, or the primary face of the website itself. How does that tie in? You guys have this personal message of family first and then evolving. Together as a family, evolving, is what I’m deciphering from you guys. How does the site tie in to that? How does the site—What’s your goal with the site?

With the site, I just like to share our experiences. So I’m writing about what we’re doing. I’m also offering tips and advice about how to do it. How to manage education and where to go and everything.

Sure. It’s almost like a megaphone for your guys’ experience. Get those out to other people that may be looking at, “Well, it’s nice if you want to travel, but I have three kids. I could never do that.”

Right.

Absolutely.

Emails I get all the time. People who say, “When you guys have your second child, things will change.”

We hear that all the time.

So when you guys have your sixth, it’s definitely going to be different. I love that, because I think that we need more megaphones from people who break down barriers, who break down excuses. And I think—I’m flattered that we get to do that for a very, very small group of people with one kid.

But it’s awesome to be able to share your guys’ story, to say, “Hey, there is almost no excuse. You can make it happen. You can be frugal. You can go with five kids. You can realize whatever is your priorities, and you can make those happen.” So that’s why I’ve enjoyed having you guys on and I enjoy sharing your story.

So I always finish up, wrap up these sort of interviews. And I haven’t told you guys this before. So this is a little bit of a surprise. But I want you guys to ask a question of the Man Vs. Debt readers. You guys have to come up with a question. You ask, and we’ll get the feedback from the readers. Either one of you can jump in, and I know it’s—I love surprising people with this question. If you could ask one thing, what would you ask?

Tough.

That is tough.

There are no wrong questions.

A question for your readers.

I would think, “What is it that holds people back?”

You’re on the same page. Go with it.

“What is it that holds people back from doing what they really want to do?”

If I—I may even be able to evolve that a little bit. ‘Cause I love this question. When it was asked to me one time, I think it literally changed my life. “What’s the #1 thing that’s holding you back?” Right now, what’s the #1 thing that’s holding you back?

And eliminate that, and then your next #1, and move that one.

Yeah, keep moving it on. If you guys can help all of us out by listing out what the #1 thing is holding you back, and again, Greg and Rachel, thanks for joining me today.

Thank you.

Thank you.

And it’s an honor to be able to share your guys’ story and spend a couple days here with our families together.

Thanks.

The Dennings Ask: What’s the #1 barrier that’s holding you back from your own goals?

What a great question!

What’s the number one hurdle – right now – that’s keeping you from your own vision of the life you want to lead?

I hope you are as inspired by the Denning family as we were! Follow them here!

xoxoxo,

-Baker